FC Dallas and The Rainbow Connection

Should you tire of my style of in-depth soccer analysis, may I recommend, officially now, Prost Amerika’s Sounders FC blog. Start here for their FC Dallas Match Preview where you can learn that FC Dallas is known as “Hoops” to the fans and media. Then when you wonder what the Kermit reference is in the article subtitle, flip back over here for the connection.

It refers to no less than one of the best names I have encountered since I was enthralled with all fourteen letters of “Saltalamacchia” squeezed across the shoulders of an MLB jersey. That would be one of this weekend’s referees, Kermit Quisenberry.

Why aren’t more mothers naming their boys Kermit these days? Look what futures they might have: professional soccer referee or singing partner to Debbie Harry:



There’s more, thankfully, on this weekend’s match at MLS.net and really anywhere else but here. Finally for you gay men who visited with the search-word promise of “Rainbow Connection,” well, this won’t let you down, will it?

Rabbit Portends Hat Trick Against Chicago

“Here we go with your weekly chance to be the most boring person in your bar or family.”

It’s official. After two trial runs of Prost Amerika Soccer’s Meaningless Statistical Guide to the Game, I am fully prepared to designate them Genius Soccer Blogger Extraordinaire.

And while you’re pondering the number of left foot, right foot, and header goals Sounders FC and the Fire have tallied up so far, might I suggest that you brush up on your definition of Hat Trick and add a few more meaningless statistics to your pregame repertoire?

While I’m sure you discerning soccer enthusiasts know that a hat trick refers to a single player scoring three goals in a single game, did you know that a player achieves a “Perfect Hat Trick” when the three goals scored are from his right foot, left foot, and head? Moreover you can accomplish a hat trick of hat tricks by scoring hat tricks in three consecutive matches.

So here's hoping for a Sounders FC hat trick tomorrow night in Chicago!

PS – Huge bonus points to any Superfan who makes this their regular Sounders FC home game costume (buy here for a mere $700!). An esoteric costume is an especially bold one, and I guarantee you will not be thought “boring.”